A High School Trip! What could go wrong? There's a change in the cold winds but what kind of chain reactions come with it? Rejected hearts change courses and the time for self-discovery is now!
PART VII - TENSION AT THE PLAZA
It’s a chilly day and the ground is powdered in a thin layer of fresh snow as the students wander off the bus and begin the third day of their trip.
“Now remember! In two hours we will meet back here and then go to the Axe-Throwing place,” their chaperone shouts as they fan out to explore the Three Lakes Market–a series of stand-alone buildings with different attractions inside, mostly shopping.
Alice can tell Ryder is grumpy, in the way that he walks with stiffness and a fixed frown. She hopes his neck pain didn’t return. Unbeknownst to her, it did return, mostly because Ryder had tried to fit his long frame into the small loveseat all night, barely getting any sleep with his neck at a weird angle.
After spin-the-bottle it was clear that mending their…whatever they had together was not possible, not with the way Alex had looked at him before kissing Angelo; Ryder refused to wake up with that hope again.
Alice grabs his arm, in an attempt to try to comfort him, despite her being the root of all his problems, “Let’s go in here, I think I see an arcade!”
“Sure,” he responds without a hint of enthusiasm or indication he actually wants to.
She takes his confirmation anyway and pulls him into a side room that contains a few pinball machines. She reaches into her skirt pocket and retrieves a few coins, “Let’s share a game!”
Ryder shrugs and stands off to the side, as he correctly guesses Alice would take the first turn. She positions herself behind the machine, fingers at the buttons, and launches the pinball. Ryder slowly moves his head to the left and right trying to work out the knots and not alert Alice to it; he doesn’t need her fawning over him again no matter how good of back rubs she gives.
“Ooh did you see that? I hit it into the pocket!” Alice does a little hop in glee, her golden-brown curls bounce around her shoulders.
She really is a beautiful girl, it was just a shame her personality doesn’t reflect her outward appearance. Ryder sighs and narrows his eyes, trying to keep his neck straight, “Sorry, but I missed it.”
“Why did you bring your briefcase with you today?” Lai wonders at Caleb as they head toward one of the buildings, maybe a souvenir shop by the looks inside.
“Well, we are shopping today, might as well bring my own bag if I find anything I want to buy,” he explains. Lai thinks it’s very good of him to consider the environment and to plan ahead about that kind of stuff.
“By the way…” Caleb eyes her and she feels different about it. If he ever glanced at her before in the same way she didn’t notice, how could she never have noticed this gaze of his before?
“Yes? What is it?” she asks with an encouraging smile that turns into a yawn.
He blinks, seeming to be thrown off his initial thought, “You okay?”
She chuckles lightly, “Yeah just a bit tired, we stayed up pretty late kissing–by the way how was it?”
Caleb arches a brow with confusion, “How was what?”
She sticks out her tongue playfully with a wink, “Your first kiss?”
Caleb’s face reddens slightly and he looks at the ground, “I thought you were my first kiss.”
“Wait, what? Are you talking about the peck on the lips from our kiss science experiment in second grade?” she asks incredulously. She never counted that as a real kiss and feels a bit bad that Caleb does.
He only nods and then adjusts his glasses, “By definition, it was a type of kiss, and the first I ever had from a non-family member. Ergo, a first kiss.”
Lai laughs in amusement at his very literal approach, “Okay okay…fair but…I guess I mean…I’m asking…” She trails off, seeing he’s not as amused, he is totally serious about it. She finds her gaze drifting down to his lips again, “...how was your first teenage kiss?”
He purses them in thought and shrugs, “It was fine, kind of exciting but kind of lacking since there was no emotion behind it–similar to the one from second grade.”
With that said, so nonchalantly, he continues into the souvenir shop and she follows feeling a bit disheartened that the limited kissing he’s experienced has only been from tasks needing to be fulfilled rather than anyone truly wanting to kiss him.
The feeling is short-lived because Caleb is already moving on and making a sound indicative of happiness as they stop in front of a comic book display.
Lai knows Caleb has always loved comics; he collects a specific one named ‘Action Cat!’
“What’s new with Action Cat?” Lai reaches out to a comic and grabs one, thumbing through it and finding colorful panels. Caleb used to read them to her sometimes when they hung out on summer vacations.
“Action Cat last walked into a catnip trap, so I need to see how they’re going to get out of that conundrum,” Caleb explains and Lai giggles but again, finds herself yawning.
“Watch my briefcase,” Caleb says, puts a comic back onto the display, and brushes past her abruptly.
“What? Wait, where are you going?”
He turns around with a smile, “Mocha latte, with a double shot of espresso, right?”
She knots her brows with a confused smile. Why is he reciting the coffee that she usually orders? Wait, how does he even know it?
He sees her confusion and says “You clearly need a pick-me-up since you are yawning up a storm this morning. Don’t worry, I will be back in a few.”
Before she can protest, he’s out the door and she’s looking after him, bemused at his action. There might be a coffee stand in one of the other buildings, but she hadn’t noticed it. Speaking of how observant he is, he must have picked up on her coffee preferences based on the one she had the other morning on the bus. Well, she did fall asleep on his shoulder, he probably didn’t have much to do but stare at things or risk waking her up.
It’s just another detail she realizes that makes him so awesome. She looks through some more comics and decides that since he is getting coffee for her, she should get him something. She glances down at his briefcase and is struck with a sudden idea. She could buy him a comic and slip it in there, then he can be surprised later when he finds it!
She doesn’t know how much time she has before he’s back with coffee, but selects an interesting-looking comic from the display and hustles over to buy it.
Maybe it will start him on a new comic-collecting journey. From what she sees it’s a comic about aliens.
The cashier takes her money and gives her a receipt, and she kneels to stash the issue inside, unclasping the soft leather briefcase. Why he doesn’t use a backpack like the rest of them she doesn’t know, but he can be extra fancy about things and this is just one of them.
A few papers fall out and she quickly puts the comic inside and gathers the papers up to return them inside as well but something catches her eye.
Her own name.
It’s on an official-looking document. The header contains the Preparatory Academy logo and name. It’s a request for Headmaster evaluation. She doesn’t understand at first, why Caleb has this in his bag but then quickly realizes it’s what he’s been trying to tell her about–whatever silly school thing he wanted her to look at on the bus.
He wants her to join him at the Academy.
April, Colleen, and Noire have taken to grouping together now that they have gotten comfortable in each other’s company and find themselves in the small clothing store of the Market.
“I need more warm clothes,” Colleen mentions, “I didn’t think it would be so cold.”
“We’re in the mountains…in the winter,” April teases, “Why didn’t you think it would be cold?”
Colleen shrugs, “Coastal mountain locations in the north are quite temperate, Like Memosa Bay. I thought maybe the large bodies of water would have the same effect.”
“I could let you borrow something,” Noire offers.
Colleen smiles politely, “You and I don’t really have the same…sense of fashion.”
Noire nods in agreement, as Colleen pulls out a pink shirt from the rack, and eyes it, “Better wearing something outside your aesthetic than left feeling cold.”
Angelo and Alex are cold. They’re still outside.
They haven’t really talked about what happened during spin-the-bottle, just sort of went to bed afterward, got up, dressed, and are now loitering in the middle of the market.
“How about this bear,” Alex points at a large, carved, wooden sculpture–just to try to make it less awkward.
Angelo approaches and touches the wood grain, feeling the grooves, and ridges of the statue, “It must have taken a long time to carve. Props to the artist.”
Alex starts taking out his phone from his pocket, it might be useless to connect to social media in this remote location but it can still take pictures, “Can you snap a pic of me in front of it?”
Angelo gestures for Alex to keep his phone in his pocket and removes his own just as quickly, simultaneously throwing an arm around Alex and holding it out in front of them, “I got you.”
Alex doesn’t have much time to think about the action before his need to look good in pictures overtakes him and he flashes a peace sign accompanied by a smile as the camera flashes. He feels a slap on his shoulder where Angelo’s hand was previously resting and Angelo follows up by saying, “Cool. I’ll text this to you.”
“Wanna go inside? It’s pretty cold out,” Alex holds out his hands and catches a few falling snowflakes in them to prove so, they melt instantly, leaving droplets of water on his skin.
“Why didn’t you wear a coat today?” Angelo wonders and turns to go into the nearest building. Alex has a comfy-looking sweater on, with the sleeves rolled up his forearms. He looks good in it but Angelo thinks it’s silly he didn’t bundle up. They are, after all, in the mountains, in winter.
“The sun was shining, I thought it would be warming up today. Maybe if my PHONE would get a signal I could look up the temperature before I go out.”
“I just asked the front desk person at the motel.”
“Well, aren’t you resourceful?” Alex smarms with a hint of embarrassment for not considering it, following Angelo inside and thankful they can fall back into talking easily after all the awkward silences since last night.
They enter the warm building, and it melts the chill off but Alex almost seems to freeze as they walk into a small arcade room and find Ryder and Alice. She appears to be closer than necessary. Ryder looks up, almost startled at their presence, and catches Alex’s fleeting look of disappointment before it transforms into a frown.
Ryder can take a hint.
Despite Alice’s protests, Ryder pushes past all of them and out of the building, his whole body stiff with anger and neck pain.
Alex doesn’t say anything, just slips a few coins into the nearest pinball machine. The silence is awkward once again and Angelo feels exasperated–is Alex over Ryder, or not? It makes it extremely difficult for Angelo to risk making any more advances on him.
Ryder hates that Alex is disgusted with him, he hates how Alex isn’t willing to let Ryder talk about it and explain it was all a mistake, and he hates Alice for putting them all into this position in the first place. He hates how much his neck hurts. He hates the cold.
He can hear her shouting his name as he marches across the Market, to a different building on the other side.
“Ryder! Hold up!” she demands, clasping his hand as enters what seems to be a small grocery and coffee area. He pulls away and begins to pace in front of the fireplaces in the middle. They aren’t lit but it’s still much warmer inside than it is outside.
Alice sits down on a nearby sofa, “Ryder, what…what’s wrong?”
"Why do you even like me, Alice?"
She didn’t expect him to ask that.
Why did she? It had to be more than his breathtaking eyes and easy smile, his tall figure, and the way he glided on a skateboard in her driveway. Maybe it was the fact she saw how happy Ryder made her brother in the times they'd hung out. She thought...perhaps she could have something like that as well. Ryder was a people-pleaser by nature, would tolerate so much, and go along for the ride–bumps and all with a person if they were worth sticking with. He was still letting her stick with him. There had to be something he felt to allow her to be near.
"Guys at my school, they only like me because of how I look. They don't seem to care about what I’m interested in, what my dreams or interests are, or how ambitious I am, their eyes are just stuck below my face. Whenever I talk to you, you don't look at me like that–you've always been kind, always listened to what I actually say, and I see how happy Alex is with you...and I want that."
Alexander, for all his flaws, was actually a pretty great big brother. He always helped Alice get what she wanted if she asked. He did her homework when she got frustrated, threatened anyone who dared try to talk badly about her at school, gave her the last of any candy in the house, taught her to play chess, and this was the first time when something she wanted was of his and his alone. It couldn't be given, even if he'd wanted to. Ryder Greystone's affection was not a piece of candy that could be easily transferred to her from Alex's possession and she didn’t seem to realize it.
"Have you taken a look lately?" Ryder snaps. He pities Alice, he really does, she's never been told 'no' before and can't seem to grapple with the consequences. He feels sorry for her plight of being so beautiful that she can't make headway into the dating world without running into a field of red flags and finding someone who genuinely likes her but that's how adolescence works.
The people they date now, are not going to be the ones they end up with later in life, Hells the people they are now are not who they will be by graduation. Being a teenager is about making mistakes and learning from them.
She needs to gain some perspective and hear the brutal truth of it, "...I can't even make him smile at me anymore. I'm watching Angelo Sanchez slowly take my place as his best friend and there's nothing I can do about it because he won't talk to me. It kills me. This is why I won't date you, Alice.
I'm not attracted to people who are manipulative and don't consider anyone else when they want what they want. You are like a hurricane of selfishness, and Alex and I are just pieces of debris in your wake. Do yourself a favor and just give up the delusion of anything happening between us because it's not a reality."
He feels heated and knows he needs to leave her before he says anything more harsh that he will end up regretting. He doesn't want to insult her but it feels like his social life has been torn asunder all because of Alice's so-called 'ambition'. "We're done here."
“But–” she grabs his hand again with a whine, in an attempt to keep him there as he begins to leave.
He turns his gaze on her and she’s never seen his eyes so engulfed with cold fury, she removes her hand quickly as if his skin is like the surface of the sun.
“We’re done here,” he repeats, his voice hard and incontestable.
She gulps and gives a small nod of acquiescence.
He leaves her, sitting alone. It’s against every fiber of his being to do it but it needs to be done. He can’t let her keep doing this to him, and it’s definitely hard because he thinks she can be a funny and interesting person, just not when she views him as an object of desire.
He’s not a prize. He cannot be won nor forced into his feelings and Alice doesn’t have enough tact or emotional intelligence to handle the situation with ease or empathy.
Alice takes in a breath trying to keep her throat from choking on a sob; she can feel the tears threatening to spill. It’s more than just not getting her way, it’s knowing Ryder despises her. Knowing that she has upset him so badly he may never talk to her again.
She didn’t think she was pushing too hard for his attention, but couldn’t deny that her stunt of trying to kiss him in full view of her brother would cause Alex to close off. She knew it would, and she did it anyway. She knew Alex would be mad about it, and she also knew Alex could find others to crush on, so didn’t think it was a big deal. Maybe she really is that selfish because she assumed Ryder’s attention wouldn’t be ripped in half between her and her brother anymore.
But she never had it to begin with.
That’s when the tears break through and lay waste to her mascara. All the effort she had put into dolling up that morning, to look perfect for Ryder, is undone.
Is this what heartbreak feels like? The tears pool in her eyes, and she lets them fall–sliding down her cheeks before dropping. She crumples over and hides her face in despair.
Through her blurred vision, she sees a figure walk past, they seem startled at finding her crying, alone, and halt. They shift from foot to foot with consideration.
She wills them to leave, to not see her in such a pathetic state. She’s never been rejected so badly before. Her breaths come short, her heart pounding, her head aching, her heart in her throat.
But the boy in glasses is not the type that can just ignore a girl sitting there in front of him and crying without trying to help. Caleb approaches her with a cup of coffee in hand and looks her crumpled figure over with concern.
“Alice,” he says, there’s a hesitation as if he’s going to regret asking, “Are you going to be okay?”
He doesn’t even know what’s wrong with her, but if he had one guess it probably has to do with Ryder Greystone.
Alice sniffles and looks up, while wiping at her eyes–messing up her already messy face. She looks like a disaster with her ugly cry, no one but her family usually sees her like this, “I don’t think so. Not for a while. I…I…messed up so badly.”
“I’m sorry,” he offers his condolences.
“You don’t even know what happened, what are you sorry for?”
He lets out a small sigh, “I know how it feels. To be attracted to someone so much it’s all you can think about. And when they don’t feel the same way, it hurts. A lot.”
Her eyes widen at his very insightful response and knows it’s regarding Lai. Alice has seen the way he looks at Lai, in a way she wished Ryder would look at her.
“Yeah,” she exhales in agreement. “Well, what do you do? How do you get past feeling it? How do you say sorry if you’ve hurt them?”
Caleb bites his bottom lip in thought, then without her invitation sits down next to her and sets his coffee down while considering the questions.
As he thinks, she considers him.
He’s in the class above her at the Academy, she’s never really talked to him before, just knows he’s the son of the Education Minister and a part of the Cosgrove family, which gives him a lot of sway at school.
“Always apologize if you’ve wronged someone, even if they don’t forgive you, even if you are genuine–it will make it better than not saying anything,” he advises.
She nods, apologies are not her strong suit. She hates admitting when she’s been wrong about something. It’s a very rare occurrence.
“Also, it’s not easy to get over an unrequited crush–you have to accept it isn’t to be, and focus your thoughts elsewhere. A relentless pursuit will only push them farther away…”
Alice snorts with derision, it is too late for that.
He raises a brow at the unexpected noise and continues, “...as I was saying, just focus your thoughts elsewhere. You never know, you could find someone else that catches your fancy ten times more than you thought possible.”
With that he flashes a smile and stands, taking his leave, “Don’t worry Alice, you have plenty of options you can change your focus to.”
“Like what? You?” she snarks and then winces. They’d never even talked before, not even the other night when they kissed during spin-the-bottle. She knew he was much too serious to even consider her like that. But why did she say that? That was probably the most cringe thing she’s ever done. Here he was, being nice and answering her questions, and she was mocking him.
Her self-loathing increases. She may not ever show it but it’s something she feels quite often.
He turns around and gives her a long, considering look before smirking doubtfully, “Not every guy is going to fall at your feet. You probably wouldn’t want them anyway.”
How would he know?
It was true, though. She didn’t and never had wanted those who threw themselves at her feet. She likes challenges.
She appraises him as he walks away; noticing that he looks at the ground in front of him instead of the path ahead. His shoulders carry a slight slouch that tells her he isn’t as confident as he pretends to be. He is just as unsure and scared of rejection as she is despite his wise words to get over it and wear a mask of confidence.
Caleb, now he…he could be a challenge.
Caleb, now he…he could be a challenge.
She flips her hair and wipes at her eyes as she stands, “You’re right.”
He halts, turns toward her curiously, and raises his brows in slight surprise. It was just hopeful thinking she would ever consider his suggestions, “About which part?”
“That I should change my focus. Thanks for that advice.”
“You’re welcome.”
Being a teenager is indeed about learning from their mistakes.
She won’t make the same mistake with Caleb Cosgrove.
“So you are saying, if you had nothing else to wear, you’d wear this pink shirt?” Colleen asks slyly, waving the pink shirt she’s pulled from the rack.
Noire openly laughs at the style, “It’s not my tenth or twentieth choice but I would if I was desperate and why are you thinking of me without clothes?”
Colleen balks, “That’s not what I meant! I think it would just be interesting to see you in a bright color, you’ve worn nothing but dark neutrals on this trip.”
Noir gestures to herself, “Are aqua and white not bright enough for you?”
Colleen blows a huff of frustrated air out and it jostles her bangs, causing Noire to grin. She should just come out and say she’s curious to know what Noire looks like in the color pink. Colleen’s favorite color is pink.
“Tell you what,” Noire grabs the shirt from Colleen, “Let us swap styles, I’ll change into this if you wear something dark and edgy.”
April grins at the suggestion which could prove rather amusing.
“Okay, deal!” Colleen starts looking through the rack for something that Noire would more likely want to wear.
“No, no I get to choose,” Noire laughs, “since you picked this out.”
With opposite outfits in hand, they make their way to the changing booths. April stays out of their game, content to be a watcher of who wears the opposite style better.
Colleen picked out a dark skirt to go with the pink top, so at least that is something in Noire’s usual palette of grays and blacks. There’s a reason Noire doesn’t usually wear skirts, at least not without leggings; her legs are as pale as the snow outside. She steps out of the changing booth where Colleen and April await her different look.
“I think I look silly,” Noire states. The pink shirt hugs what little curves she has and without any leggings, her legs are cold.
“No, you look great!” Colleen disagrees, “The color is good on you.”
April makes a face that says it's a middling look on Noire.
“Thanks,” Noire raises her brow in doubt still. What’s more, it’s not just a color she wouldn’t usually wear but the style is something more preppy, she looks like an Academy student out on the weekend. At least the shirt is warm, made of sweater material, and has a hood. She fiddles with the drawstrings, “Now it’s your turn.”
She pushes back into the changing booth and quickly gets back into her comfy oversized tunic sweater and black leggings. She doesn’t know why she entertained Colleen’s idea, it wasn’t like they were buying any of these outfits.
As she steps out, Colleen also exits from her changing room and at the same time does a fist pump with a shout, “This isn’t too bad!”
Noire nearly jumps back and then can’t help but smile because Colleen looks precious in a dark jean jacket and striped shirt, the only thing she needs is dark glasses frames to match. It’s kind of humorous because Colleen does have a very dainty figure but the back of the jacket has a full-on skull and crossbones. Noire beams at the sight, maybe it was worth swapping styles to see Colleen look a bit edgier.
“Not bad,” Noire concedes, “Maybe if you wore something like this, people wouldn’t mess with you.”
“It doesn’t feel like me," Colleen admits, “but I do like the jacket.”
“Then get it,” Noire suggests and Colleen seriously considers it. She’s stuck to her comfort zone for a long time, so any small step out of it is an improvement.
“So about last night…” Angelo decides to broach the subject. He can’t stop replaying that kiss that Alex gave him in his head. He even dreamt about it and he hardly remembers his dreams. The memory of the sensation has kept his body in a constant high of dopamine that he never wants to come down from.
“Oh yeah, that was pretty wild! Sorry if I..kind of got overly gung-ho about it,” Alex says sheepishly and Angelo shifts his gaze to Alex in mild dismay–did Alex think the kiss was a mistake?
The pinball rolls into the hole and Angelo swears, for not having paid attention and losing it. Then, he gathers his wits to look Alex in the eye, “It’s okay, I actually didn’t mind it. At all.”
They hold each other’s stare for a moment, Alex the first to avert his eyes, “Cool. Cool. Yeah, I…I didn’t mind it either.”
Is Alexander Calhoun actually blushing?
That is Angelo’s last pinball, so he maneuvers himself away from the machine to let Alex have a turn. Alex’s fingers slide over the button and his hand is on the pull-trigger to launch a new pinball.
Angelo clears his throat which has suddenly gone dry, “I just don’t wanna piss Ryder off, you know?”
Alex doesn’t pull the launch trigger, but instead grimaces.
“Ryder’s problem is that he’s afraid of confrontation. So even if you do piss him off he won’t tell you, he won’t say a thing about it and pretend everything is all right.” Alex sounds more than frustrated explaining it but still manages a sardonic, embittered laugh, “Besides he’d rather be kissing Alice anyway. So I doubt he cares if you kiss me.”
“You still like him,” Angelo states. It’s not a question.
“I like you too,” Alex says bluntly but doesn’t refute the fact he likes Ryder either. It’s possible to like more than one person at the same time. Angelo is mildly shocked at Alex’s claim and shows it by raising both of his pierced brows.
“You’ve always worked for what you want, I’ve seen you stay late at the skate park trying to land the next trick until it’s perfect. You are easy to talk to and to chill with even in silence. It’s admirable, it’s attractive. I’ve just been into Ryder for so long that I never really noticed. Sorry.”
“You know, sometimes your directness is scary.”
“I’m not very subtle, no,” Alex agrees.
Angelo sighs, “So, what happens if Ryder wises up, ditches Alice, and comes back?”
“Hey,” Alex says in an exhale as he puts a hand on Angelo’s shoulder; he steps closer–his face inches away, and his warm breath hits and rolls off Angelo’s cheek–Angelo closes his eyes else will be tempted to do something in their close proximity. “Don’t worry about it.”
That’s all Angelo needs to hear. Alex suddenly finds himself being pushed backward until his shoulders hit the corners of the wall. They are out of sight and no one else is in the room. Angelo leans forward and rests their foreheads together.
The intensity of Angelo’s gaze leaves Alex mildly stunned, he feels himself slipping down the wall, knees suddenly like jelly. He is usually the one to initiate these kinds of encounters, being so direct in his intentions. So having the script flipped–to be pursued like this–catches him off guard.
“Then I won’t.”
With that said, Angelo’s fist closes around the collar of Alex’s shirt, keeping him upright and steady as he returns the kiss from the previous night. This time, there’s no one there to tell them to stop.
The way Angelo kisses is possessive and hungry, quite a different sensation from what Alex is used to in the hesitant, careful, and deliberate approach Ryder’s lips have always taken in those summer afternoons where hanging out usually led to making out.
It’s thrilling. It’s wonderful. Alex can’t believe he’s been missing out on this. Even with his eyes closed it feels like they have been opened to new possibilities.
Ryder may have had the philosophy that being a teenager is about making mistakes and learning from them, but to Alex, being a teenager is about trying everything to learn about one’s self better.
And he's now learned that he likes kissing Angelo.
Comments
Post a Comment